Just when you thought it was safe...
Jul. 04, 2002 - 8:48 p.m.

So I thought everything was good.

But then I slept all day and had horrible dreams. It was about all the bad stuff if Rad doesn't come back.

Basically I'm upset cuz he was trying to say what if and what would we do if he found a girl and fell in love..

But it just makes me feel sad. For some reason I never thought of that.

Basically if he falls in love with someone he won't have feelings for me anymore. And I've been thinking then it's really over cuz if he comes back he wouldn't even want to get back together.. he wouldn't like me anymore...

It's stupid. Cuz he could get another crush on me from talking.. and I'd visit him again if they broke up.. And even from online he could get a crush on me...

And when he comes back we would hang out and we could fall in love with eachother..

But it still depresses me..

And it's like why does he think about being with someone else when I'm so pretty and sweet.

I know he doesn't want to be with someone else right now. And I know he wants to come back here and he wants us to get together again...

But him thinking about it makes me sad, like he wants it... OMG Britney's on TV.. it's BOMT on HBO!!!!!!!!!!!! ...

OMG Britney's amazing. And :( I want to sing..

Anyway, like he wants to be with someone else... but he was just thinking what if.. he doesn't want to hurt me.. ha he joked about him staying in the house and he can't meet girls like that. ;) He's so sweet.. he just says he's thoughtful..

I need to talk to him. Writing this is making me sad again.

I felt a little better since I read the counter and there were 25 hits today, so minus me that's 24.

Then I was thinking I wish Friends were on tonight.. and I realized it was 8.. and thursday.. so I watched Friends and it was all about Joey.. and I ate Rice Krispy treats and felt better...

Sigh.. ok that makes me feel a little better.. Now I wanna watch brit on the 4th of July special.. but Joe's watching tv out there too loud and he's yelling at Tasha. :'( I need to talk to Radleigh, like on the phone.. maybe he can call me tomorrow...

Mood: Yucky.
Listening to: July 4th Special
About to: Watch that.. and when Britney's not on I will work on this site cuz I need to put stuff up.

Posted by: Lucid-Dreamer
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